Old Dog, New Trick

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Kylie Jan 2015

Recently I had a problem.  I wanted to learn something new – very quickly – to help my nephew.

I wanted to learn how to create a website.

This was not a totally selfless act, mind you, since any skills I learned could be used on my own website.  Challenge was that I kept running into negative roadblocks everywhere I turned.

  • “You can’t do this; you’re too old”.
  • “Remember how bad you are at programming? You made your first ever “D” when you tried to learn FORTRAN in college”.
  • “Websites are tricky; best to leave it to the professionals.”
  • “What the %$#@ are you thinking?”

And those roadblocks were just from my own thoughts, my own lack of confidence with computer technology. ME, trying to tell ME I couldn’t do it.

So typical for someone whose first experience with computers involved punch cards, a giant main-frame and hours waiting in line for your program to print-out, only to discover that one do-loop buried in your code had sabotaged the entire program.

No wonder I was afraid of trying something new with computers.

I mentioned my frustration at trying to either find someone to create the site for my nephew or someone to teach me how to do it to a new colleague at a networking lunch.  There was no time to enroll in a lengthy class; this was a two week assignment. As luck would have it, this new colleague knew websites.  And he volunteered to help me.

Hallelujah!

It was a business deal, for sure. He was going to do the hands-on work and build the site. In return I would review copy for a series of video tutorials he had been developing aimed at teaching others how to build their own websites.

Ah-ha! It was my light-bulb moment; the opportunity I had been looking for.

I became his ‘test student’, reviewing the course and putting the lessons to work to see if I could build the site by myself.  I assured him if this “old dog” could learn to build a site from the tutorials, then anyone could do it.

Was the prospect of trying to learn something new scary?  I’m not gonna lie; I was a bit nervous.  Nightmares of FORTRAN and punch cards came rushing back to me.  My dreams became giant do-loops.

But just like most things, the anticipation was far worse than the actual event.

And before I knew it, I had actually built a website! Complete with photos, video, text, multiple pages, etc.

Truth be told, with proper training it wasn’t that difficult to learn.  Honestly, I’m mad at myself for not trying to learn sooner.

Do I know everything about websites? Of course not.  It was only a few lessons and there is so much more to it.  Yet I am still impressed with my results and so grateful to my colleague for helping me.

Many of you may not consider this a big deal and are wondering why I’ve bothered to write about it.  After all, computers have been around for ages and it’s hard to understand why anyone would be afraid of them.  Plus you can Google just about anything these days, including “how to build a website”.

It’s just that many times I meet people in their forties and fifties who say they are too old to learn, or don’t have time to learn, or don’t have an interest in learning.  That makes me so sad – for them.

When these same people tell me that, based on their own job search experience, “There are no jobs out there for older workers”, it makes me wonder if it’s because these people refuse to learn something new.

I know, I know – there’s age discrimination and other factors.  Yet I still believe that having marketable skills that show you are current, paired with a desire to learn, may help get your foot in the door.

Besides, when does learning stop at a certain age?  I know plenty of octogenarians who are regulars at the community college and are constantly learning new technology just to keep up with their grandchildren.

Even if we’re not in the hunt for a new job, learning keeps us engaged and is good for our brain health.

Yes, you can teach an old dog a new trick.

4 Things To Help At Home Workers Get Back In the Groove After The Holidays

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boxes

The hardest part of the holidays? Going back to work.

The alarm clock. The traffic. The piles of papers greeting you, the ones left on your desk as you scrambled out the door for the holidays.  The thousands of emails that somehow filled your inbox while everyone was supposed to be on vacation.

Doesn’t anyone understand what “vacation” means anymore?

Going back to work is grueling for all of us but can be particularly difficult for those of us who work from home. We have nowhere to escape to; no colleagues to commiserate with now that the holidays are over and it’s back to the ol’ grind.

Once again the separation of Home and Work becomes blurred.  Especially if we have yet to de-decorate and our home still “feels” like Christmas. What we face is that holiday ho-hum feeling that seeps into our work space.

I will share the situation I faced, which is probably similar to many who work from home:

  • Leftover holiday treats called out to me from the kitchen, tempting me to walk away from my work.
  • Empty gift boxes were stacked in the living room that needed to go to the trash.
  • The Christmas DVD’s were still on the coffee table from recent viewing.
  • And the tree! It was still up, decorated, in all its glory.

Not to mention the outside décor.  Even though I rarely venture out to the front of the house, I knew it was there.

Situations like this call for tough love.  Here are four things people who work from home should do to get back in the groove after the holidays:

Take down the tree. 

This is the most time consuming, yet the most rewarding and best way to feel like Christmas has left the building.  I put it off yet once I got started it only took me an hour to remove the ornaments and pack them away.  Yes, we like to think a lighted tree can be considered a “desk lamp” but it really is a distraction. Do. It. Now.

Remove All Remaining Holiday Décor. 

While you’ve got the spirit, go ahead and box up the rest of the holiday décor.  This seemed daunting to me, yet again took only another hour once I started. Move all of the boxes back to their storage place – or at least to another room where you can’t see them.

Put the holiday cards in a box. 

These tempt me to stop working and re-read them, so “out of sight, out of mind”.  Note that I didn’t say “trash them” – unless of course you have already reviewed them and noted address changes. I haven’t done that, so I put mine in a box for later review – I do that while watching mindless TV like “The Bachelor”.  But they are out of sight for now.

Hide the Christmas candy and treats.

The treats call to me when I’m working and distract me.  I have to be tough and throw out the items that I really don’t need, like or want to eat.  For example, the caramel corn from the treat tower – we still had last year’s package so my guess is we are not going to eat this year’s.   The rest is hidden from view in the pantry.  It’s better for my waistline and my productivity.

Total time spent:  Less than three hours.  That’s one morning – or less, depending on how early you start.

What are you waiting for?  Get started now so the rest of your week is productive!

Besides, Valentine’s Day will be here before you know it.

This Year Will Be Different

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Christmas card 2012 pic

New Year’s resolutions: I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again now, I really HATE them.

Why? Because we tend to set ourselves up for failure. We may as well call them “New Year’s Failures”.

On January 1st we state our resolutions, listing all the things we plan to achieve during the next twelve months. We are certain that THIS YEAR will be DIFFERENT from every other year.

Our intentions are good yet for most of us, somewhere along the way we get side-tracked. Life Happens. And our resolutions take a back seat to other things.

Come December, we feel bad that we failed in our attempt.  So we state, “THIS YEAR WILL BE DIFFERENT.”

And we try again.

It’s a vicious cycle; one that I normally don’t participate in since I know that I won’t stick to any resolutions.

Case in point: For years I’ve tried for abs of steel and for years the donut shop has won, despite my strategy of limiting my donut intake and increasing my workouts.

No, I’m not totally giving up donuts. That would be terrible and I’m convinced that there’s a way to incorporate donuts into my life while achieving abs of steel.

This year, though, I’m going to try a few resolutions again.  Perhaps I’ve gained wisdom with age and this time I will be able to stick to my resolutions.

They may not seem like much to you, yet they are important to me.

Here we go; my resolutions for 2015:

Find a new phrase for “Yes, but…..”   

This is my go-to phrase in conversations when discussing or brainstorming almost anything. It slips out without my even knowing it.  In my mind I’m trying to be helpful and think of all the possible outcomes, what if it went this way, but that happened, etc.  Apparently to others this is a negative phrase.  Who knew?   I definitely don’t mean it to be negative – it’s just me, thinking out loud.

Be more selfish.

This sounds odd yet it is necessary.  I love to help others.  So much so that I push my own work and needs aside.  That means that my goals – and work – are almost an afterthought.  And this is not good for my business, my productivity, and, ultimately, those I am trying to help.  This does not mean I will not help others; it simply means that I must prioritize my work. And sometimes that means putting me first. 

Step Out of My Comfort Zone

You may think this is easy for me. Let me assure you that it’s not always easy, even for me, to step outside of my comfort zone. It’s hard to do this because it means opening ourselves up for failure. Yet I plan to do that this year.  It may be something as simple as signing up for a Hip-Hop class, or something more drastic.  Who knows? But I will push my boundaries.

Finish What I’ve Started

This should be a no-brainer and it goes along with #2, being more selfish.  Mid-2014 I signed up for an online self-study course with the goal to finish it during the year and I let work get in the way.  Now this is moving to the front. I will finish this course.

There you have it; my resolutions for 2015.  I will report back to you at the end of the year to see if I achieved all of them, or any of them.

And we’ll see how my abs of steel look. Not holding out any hope on that one.

‘Twas The Night Before Deadline

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deadline

This week I’m taking a break from my usual career talk and posting something creative.  Not sure what came over me; perhaps I had a few too many candy canes or other holiday treats. 

Actually, I wrote a version of this for my editor at the Dallas Morning News where I’m a Community Voices Columnist.    And I thought you might enjoy this version – we can all relate to work deadlines!

Wishing you the best this holiday season!

Tami

‘Twas The Night Before Deadline

‘Twas the night before deadline

And I must confess,

Not a word written yet not a prose or a jest

The desk piled high with all sorts of junk

Files, papers, pens and some unidentified gunk.

My job is creative, I won’t argue that

It’s hard to think when I can’t see over the stacks

Plus Christmas is here! There’s just so much to do

Decorating and singing a carol or two

So I ponder and think, and work up a sweat

Doing what most creatives do best

Putting off till tomorrow what I could do right away

The deadline can wait just one more day!

Besides, my best work is done under stress

That’s it! I’ll wait till tomorrow when I’m fresh

So I’m off to the mall to visit the Claus

Although the shoe racks may cause me to pause

The hustle, the bustle, the music, the fun!

It’s hard to go home even though shopping’s done.

I drive past the houses with twinkling lights

Remembering mine is as dark as the night.

And that’s when the all-night decorating begins

Including trees, lights and inflatable snowmen.

I crawl into bed as the sun starts to rise

Oh no – I forgot my deadline!  I cry.

Back to the desk to write something witty.

Can I come up with something more than a ditty?

Will my followers see the humor here, I pray?

It’s Christmas, after all; not just any ‘ol day.

Yet the show must go on, the blog goes to “press”

Despite that my post resembles a mess.

I’m trying to maintain some sort of humor

Happy Holidays to all from one creative Baby Boomer!

When You Give A Girl Some Egg Nog

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Egg nog

What one word or phrase would describe your house right now? Festive? Decorated? Santa-ready? Stockings hung by the chimney with care?

My word is un-Christmas-y.

What? That’s not a word, you say?

Don’t argue with me; I’m not in the mood. If I say it’s a word, it’s a word.

Despite my current state of mind, I love the holidays. Both Hubby and I do.  We go all-out: décor outside and in; a fully decorated “real” tree (nothing faux here); an explosion of red and green everywhere.  The highlight for us is our Christmas card, a unique creation that visually tells the story of our year.

We decorate as though we had children. Our four-legged fur daughter just sighs each year when we bring in the tree that blocks her view of the backyard.

We love having people over to share the holidays and have fun in our home.  No grinches allowed!

Yet this year is different.  We’re just not in the mood.

Hubby’s travel schedule has been grueling. This fall my travel was crazy too.  Both of us have shoulder injuries that have us feeling less-than-one hundred percent.  And recently we’ve dealt with sad news of the passing of two friends just at holiday time.

That all adds up. And it’s drained us.

Where does that leave us decoration-wise?

We purchased the dead tree, a.k.a. a Christmas tree, and even managed to get the lights on.  But that’s it.   We added a few poinsettias, thanks to mom and her voracious appetite for Black Friday sales.  In a burst of energy fueled by caffeine and football excitement, Hubby even got the decorations out of the closet and moved them to the living room where they’ve sat ever since.

The boxes and bags allude to holiday décor, with labels that read, “Green and purple glass ornaments”, “Assorted Christmas stuff”, and “Wooden Nativity”.  All are marked “Fra-gee-lay”. 

That last one was our attempt one year at Christmas humor.  Watch the film, “A Christmas Story” if you don’t understand.

To top things off, Hubby took off again this week on one of his whirl-wind business trips.  That means if I want decorations, I’m on my own.

Part of me wants to just sit on the couch, eat cookies, drink some egg nog, close my eyes and hope that Santa’s Elves will magically appear, decorate and leave.   

The problem with that plan, aside from the obvious – that the elves would put the ornaments in the wrong place, duh – is that it means I’ve ceded control of my Christmas holiday.  I’m letting other things take the reins in terms of the way I want my holiday to turn out.

Now that I think about it, I don’t let other people or things take control of my personal brand message in business; why should I let a little tiredness or holiday cray-cray get the best of me and take control of my Christmas?

Well that’s not happening to this gal.  I’m going to pull myself off of the couch, drink my eggnog, turn on the holiday tunes and start decorating.  Watch out; our house will be decorated so well that when Hubby gets home he won’t even recognize this place!

That’s what happens when you give a girl some egg nog.

Is Being Too Generous a Weakness?

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Has anyone out there participated in those Facebook quizzes designed to provide “insight” into our personalities, our likes, our dislikes, etc.?

For a long time I was able to ignore them.  Then once, in a moment of weakness, I decided to play along. The quizzes are sort of addictive.  Now that I’ve played a few times it’s interesting to see what insightful things FB thinks I should know.

Here’s what I’ve learned so far:

What career should I have had?  Vice President.  Or, on a subsequent try, the result was engineer.  Veep I’ll take.  However if the test was really smart, FB would know that I’ve already given engineering a try and it was not a good fit.

Word that best describes me:  Ambitious.  Yep, that’s me.  When completing our college applications, we had to check a box that indicated how many degrees we planned to obtain.  I instantly checked “Master’s”.  Had no idea why; just sounded ambitious to me so I chose it.  And achieved it.

What’s your Christmas Elf name?  This was not exactly a quiz but it’s funny and embarrassing enough to share.  Sneaky Tinselbottom, that’s me.  Should I get new business cards?  Update the resume?

Your greatest weakness: You Are Too Generous.  Huh?

This last one caused me to stop and think.  I usually think of others as more generous than myself.  While I enjoy sharing and giving it’s not like we have a money tree in the yard.

This quiz was completely wrong.  (As if any of the FB quizzes are scientific and correct.)

Yet the more I thought about it, I realized there was some truth to it. Generosity doesn’t have to be monetary; one can be generous with time and attention.

And according to FB, that is a weakness.

Throughout my career I have worked with some phenomenal individuals who were willing to spend time helping me when I needed to bounce ideas, or to show me a shortcut so I didn’t waste time, or simply to point me in the right direction as opposed to floundering and possibly failing.

These individuals were generous with their time and attention.

This was especially important when I was first starting out, yet it’s still important since every once in a while even the most experienced professional needs assistance – especially when encountering new technology.

Note that these individuals did not do the work for me.  What they provided was time.  Time to listen, to discuss, and in some cases, to teach.  They also provided roadmaps or steps that might be more efficient to get things done and introductions to people that might be good for me to know to complete the project.

When “newbies” arrived at work I found myself providing the same type of assistance.  Not doing the job for them but pointing them in the right direction.

I’ve continued to do this throughout my career, treating people the way I would want to be treated if I needed some assistance.  The gratitude in their eyes says it all.

There have been times when I’ve asked for help and it’s been denied.  That’s hard to swallow, and beyond my comprehension why someone would not take a few minutes to help.

So why is being too generous a weakness? I guess because sometimes I put the needs of others before my own work. I help them first.

That’s a price I’m willing to pay. My work still gets done. And hopefully, the people I’ve helped will remember this time and pay it forward by helping someone else.

Or by helping me if I need it.  Even seasoned executives can use assistance now and then.

Five Things to Remember from College

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Two Yorkshire Pigs

I love being on a college campus!

There’s an energy that permeates just about every building and walkway.  It’s fun to watch the students coming and going, stopping to study or engaged in conversations.  They are eager to learn and are busy outlining goals for their careers.

I remember feeling that way.

Just wish that type of interest/excitement/whatever-you-want-to-call-it would continue throughout our careers.

Something happens to us work veterans after years on the job. We tend to get bogged down in the details, becoming frustrated and sometimes disillusioned to the point of wanting to throw in the towel and open a pig farm to get away from it all.

Pigs?

I’m just brainstorming here. How hard could it be? Just feed them and shelter them; they seem to be happier dirty so no need to bathe them.   Downside is the natural odor that comes with a pig as well as litter-box issues.

You know I’m kidding, but I think you get my point.  We all have moments where we lack that college enthusiasm we once had.

If you find yourself frustrated and bogged down at work or lacking that level of excitement we once had, here are five things to remember from college that may help get you back on course:

  • Continue to learn. Just because we’ve left campus doesn’t mean we should stop learning. It’s good for our brains and brings a sense of accomplishment when we’re through.  Not to mention it’s great for the resume.
  • Work with intention.  I remember being so intent on doing well for my classes that I developed almost laser-like focus to achieve a good grade.  We should do the same at work; think of how much we would accomplish!  Maybe we’ll even get a raise, if not a gold star on our Power Point presentation.  At least we can go home knowing we did our best.
  • Focus on what’s important. In school, we all had dreams and aspirations that helped us focus on the prize – getting an A, receiving a diploma and getting a job.  While we won’t get a diploma from work, by setting work-related goals we can focus on what’s truly important for us at our jobs.
  • Make new friends (network).  This was easy at school since we met other students all the time.  It’s a bit more difficult out in the work force but equally as important. Whether it’s networking, making new friends or even keeping up with old friends, make time to reach out and touch someone.
  • Look toward the future with optimism.  With our careers wide open and out in front of us, in school we were excited to jump into the future.  As our careers progress, we sometimes get so overwhelmed with the here and now that we forget that each day is building on our future.  No matter where you are in your career, try to maintain some of that fresh-out-of-school optimism. It’s amazing how good you’ll feel at work.

I’m going to continue to visit a college campus periodically to feel energized to learn and optimistic about the future – my future.

Without pigs.

Must-Haves for Thanksgiving

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Thanksgiving blog

What’s on your list of “must-haves” for Thanksgiving? 

Is it turkey or maybe cranberry sauce? How about a pair of “stretchy pants” that allows you to eat as much as you want and still be comfortable?  Big-screen TV to watch your favorite team?

All good choices, I must admit. 

May I suggest a few other things to add to your list?

  • Business cards.
  • A well-rehearsed elevator speech.
  • A couple of success stories to tell, just in case the opportunity arises.
  • A positive attitude about your job, career, or job search. Even if you’re in a slump.

While the holiday is a great day for eating, relaxing and watching football, it can also be a networking opportunity.

Think I’m nuts? 

You never know who’s going to show up for dinner.  Sometimes dad or Aunt Sue or even the next door neighbor who came to watch the game may have connections.

A similar situation happened to me at Halloween.  A neighbor hosted a party in her front yard to give away candy.  Several of us came to participate.  In between Trick-or-Treaters, we were all talking and one person mentioned she was looking for a job.

As luck would have it, I had just learned of a job that fit her credentials.  We exchanged information, the next day I connected her with the hiring manager and she lined up an interview.

Sometimes connections happen when we least expect it. Like holidays with family and strangers.

Bring your business cards to Thanksgiving dinner, along with a thankful attitude for everything you already have.

You never know what might happen.

Toot Your Own Horn

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For some of us, it’s hard to self-promote; to tell others that we are good at what we do.

Growing up I was taught that hard work would be rewarded.  As long as I took care of my room and was basically a good kid, my behavior was recognized.

At school when I put in the time and effort, I was rewarded with good grades and praise, advancement to the next level, and achievements like National Honor Society.

After college reality struck as I realized that, despite all of my hard work and effort, my good results had the potential to go unnoticed in the corporation. 

My eyes were opened to this when I began to notice colleagues talking openly about their achievements in front of key management.

At first I thought they were just being obnoxious and bragging.  Especially since some of these individuals were not really achieving any more than I was at the same point in time.

I remember thinking they were making a social faux pas; that all of their good work would be recognized and rewarded at review time.

Boy was I wrong.

I failed to understand that part of being in the “real world” included self-promotion.

In other words, Toot Your Own Horn.

The key is to own your story and package your achievements in a positive, non-bragging way to the right people.

Easier said than done; certainly something I didn’t learn in business school and definitely not at home.

My nephew reminded me of the importance of self-promotion.  A high school senior and kicker on the football team, he has earned the right to brag.  He’s good; really good.  It’s not just me, his proud aunt, saying so. His stats speak for themselves.

Accolades from coaches at kicking camps, including an NFL kicker, accompany the sizzle reel he’s sending out to college coaches.

Yet his quiet, confidence – an asset when kicking under intense pressure on the field – is almost a detriment now.

Just like his aunt when she was the same age, he believes his work should speak for itself. 

My advice to him is the same as it would be to anyone in corporate: speak up, with confidence. 

Whether it’s the CEO, your immediate manager, or in my nephew’s case, a college scout or local news media, make sure you have your talking points ready.

For my nephew, it’s the all important question, “Are you a good kicker?”

He needs to look the person in the eye and say, “Yes. My field goal percentage is X“, and rattle off the one or two stats they need to hear.

That’s not bragging; that’s unemotional self-promotion.

And it may get him the job he wants.

Five Things to Remember When You Receive a Job Offer

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It’s awesome when the phone rings with good news, right? We get all excited and we just want to shout to the world that our efforts paid off; we were successful.

Not so fast, buckaroo. (I’ve never said that word before; hope I’m using it correctly)

We spend so much time preparing for the interview that sometimes we forget to prepare for the offer.

And unlike most marriage proposals, it’s not all about just saying “yes”.

The job offer is an extension of the interview process. There are more questions to ask; negotiations to be handled; paperwork to be done.

So what do you do when the phone rings and it’s the hiring manager ready to discuss an offer?

Here are five things to remember when you receive a job offer:

Be gracious.

Thank the hiring manager for the offer. In all conversations, be polite and courteous.  Be humble and respectful.  And act excited!  As a hiring manager, there’s nothing worse than finally finding the right candidate and calling to tell them the good news, only to be met with a “meh” attitude or one that implies, “So what? I get these calls everyday”.

Be Prepared

Job offers are really negotiations in disguise. Yes, ultimately there is the job offer. But it’s a friendly game of tug-of-war, with the company trying to get the best deal for its money while you are trying to get the best deal for yourself.

Give this some thought before you receive an offer. Research salaries and benefits for similar positions at other companies in your area. Think about things like vacation, parking allowance, gym memberships, healthcare, 401K, tuition reimbursement, and any other stipulations that are important to you.

Know what you want to get out of this job deal and understand that you will have to compromise on some things.

Listen

During the call, let the hiring manager do most the talking; usually they will answer many of your questions automatically. If they have not, ask! Now is the time to get the information you need in order to make your decision.

Ask Questions

Review your offer carefully. Compare it to your list of “must-haves”.  Ask your significant other or a close confidant to review it with you, to make sure you are not caught up in the bright, shiny object that is a job offer.  You might be missing something.

If something is unclear, don’t assume it can – or will be – made good once you are employed. The time to get it right is now, while you are still in negotiations instead of six months down the road.

Follow Through

You may need time to digest the offer – that’s perfectly acceptable. Tell them again how pleased you are to have received an offer and that you would like a couple days to review it.

Caution: whatever you do, follow-up with the company! Do not leave them hanging. This is the first day of your new job, so to speak, and you want to be known as someone who “Does what she says she’ll do”.

This includes sending in any necessary paperwork or bringing whatever they ask for the first day on the job, showing up on time with a smile on your face ready to go.

Hear that phone ringing? You’ve got this! Now go out and make it happen.