Busting the Myth of Work-Life Balance

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Work life balanceI’m back! It’s good to be here. It’s been a longggg time. I’ve missed you, and this, working on my blog. So much has happened.

Let’s dive right in to something that’s been on my mind. You may be able to relate.

Work-life balance. Ever heard of it?

Maybe you read an article outlining how to achieve “work-life balance”. Or perhaps your job search goal was to find a position that would provide “work-life balance”.

I must tell you I seriously dislike the phrase, and here’s why:

Not only is it a myth; it’s a flat-out lie.

I think we – especially women – have been fed a line of bull when it comes to thinking we can somehow “have it all” in life.

Seriously. How is it possible to find true “balance” between career and home, at least by conventional standards?

Consider this: To have balance, two things must always be equal. All. The. Time.

Given that our work life and home life are not created equal to begin with, achieving balance between the two is doomed from the start.

Think about it: sometimes work will be crazy-busy, with a multi-million-dollar project and multiple deadlines. It will take every minute of every day, plus overtime to bring the project in on-time. You will do it because, well, that’s what it takes.

What about home?  The “balance pendulum” has shifted toward the office. There is no “balance” at home right now.

The good news is, the “balance pendulum” will swing back. That’s what a pendulum does; it swings back and forth.  At some point, home will require more of your attention and, mercifully, work will be calm enough to give you the time you need.

Pendulum shift, you know.

Some days it works beautifully. Others, not so much. On those days, it sucks.

If you call this, “work-life balance”, so be it.

I’d rather call this, “Work-Life Integration”.

It’s career and life. Not a balance, per se; more of an ebb and flow. Sometimes we focus more on career; sometimes we focus more on home. Most of the time, we try to weave both together to the best of our abilities.

Technology and flexible schedules provide for this work-life integration, making it easier to catch a child’s afternoon recital, assist aging parents, or meet with a home maintenance person. We can shift office productivity to after hours from virtually any location on our laptops. Again, integration vs. balance, since we’re still doing the work – and in many cases, actually working longer hours.

It’s important for each of us to recognize and understand that career and home are not equal. They will never be equal, on any given day or week.

As career women and men, together with our partners and spouses, we must determine how best to work through the ins and outs of integrating work with home; home with work.

The good news?

I believe it’s possible to be successful at work and at home. It’s not easy. It takes determination and hard work, as well as an understanding that personal compromises may have to happen both at home and on the career front.

Work-life integration. It’s not about balance. It’s about career and home simply working in tandem.

Stop Dreaming About Making a Career Change

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Dream vs PlanHow many times have you dreamed of doing something different with your career? Your life?

You stare out the window while the computer pings new messages. The office buzzes with sounds while your mind wanders as you think, “What if..?”

If I’ve learned one thing from my life and career so far, it’s that dreams are just that: dreams.

Nothing’s going to happen unless we take the steps to make it happen.

I can hear you now – or maybe it’s the voices in your head – crying some version of, “But how?”

Quite frankly, I don’t know how. That’s because I don’t know exactly what your dreaming about.

What I do know is this: there are endless possibilities out there for all of us, just waiting to happen. Pursuing these possibilities takes a few steps. Specifically, we need a plan to pursue our dreams. Or to see if it’s possible for the dream to become a reality.

Assuming you have a dream you want to pursue, consider the following:

Step 1:  Research your dream

For example, if you want to become a dog walker for a living, research the competition in your area. Visit with them. Determine the pay scale. Is the market saturated with dog walkers? Is the wage realistic for full-time work or is this a part-time gig?

Step 2: Develop a business plan

This includes any funding you might need, creative/marketing plans, legal work, etc.  Include metrics for success and time frames for accomplishing your goals.

Step 3: Share your plan with a TRUSTED partner

Not someone you just met at a bar who claims to know something about business. This person should be someone you know well and trust implicitly. Someone who also knows you very well, what you excel at, and what you don’t.  This person needs to provide constructive criticism and ideas and be strong enough to say, “No, this is not a good idea”.  You need to be strong enough to hear what this person has to say.

Step 4: Gain the support of your spouse/partner

Taking a leap of faith and leaving a salaried position, or taking on a part-time role affects the family. It’s always better if everyone is on board.

Step 5: Have an exit strategy; a Plan B.

What will you do if things don’t work out or you decide the “dream” is not what you expected?

Bottom line: I’m a firm believer in trying something new, especially when it comes to a well-thought-out career move.  So, wake-up, make a plan, and give it your best shot to turn your dream career into a reality.

No regrets, right?

Got First of the Year Energy? Jump Start Your Job Search With These 10 Tactics

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gym-room-1180016_1280Everyone seems to have lots of energy this time of year, and nowhere is that more prevalent that at the gym.

Just a few weeks ago, the gym was almost a ghost town and I had my choice of treadmills.

Now I have to fight little old ladies, gum-smacking teens, and even the gym staff to get thirty minutes on such a machine.

 

The good news is, my energy level peaks this time of year. I am ready to tackle almost anything: house projects, personal projects, and health goals.

I will outlast these workout wannabes, most of whom will be gone by Valentine’s Day.

I’ve also got excessive energy for all things career-related.

Now is my time to brainstorm new business ideas, organize my office, and jump in with both feet.

The bad news is, once I hit about June, my energy level for all types of projects – including career projects – slows way down.

If you’re anything like me, it’s best to accomplish as much as possible during this energy phase.  And I work best with a list of tactics to accomplish.

Jump Start Your Job Search With These 10 Tactics

  1. Determine your goal, with strategy and tactics for achievement. Set your intention. What is it you want to achieve, professionally? A promotion? A new job? Do you want to stay in the same industry or try something new? Once you have your end goal, add the tactics for achieving that goal and start executing.
  2. Refresh Your Resume. A resume is a living document and should be updated periodically. If you haven’t already done these:
    • Add your latest achievements from this year’s review.
    • Remove experience older than 10 years.
    • Use a professional statement instead of an objective.
    • Use key-words associated with your industry.
    • Most Important: Highlight your quantitative wins vs. job responsibilities.
    • Note: if it’s been ages since you’ve updated your resume and/or you’re struggling with the wording, you may want to consider hiring a professional Career Coach to help you.
  3. Maximize LinkedIn. LinkedIn is an amazing resource for job seekers – as long as your profile is up to date and maximized – meaning completely filled out. Use information from your updated resume to complete your profile.  Take a more personal tone with your professional summary versus that of your resume, telling prospective recruiters why they should do hire you.
  4. Check Your Look in the Mirror. First impressions are made within seconds of meeting a person, and yes, they are visual.  When was the last time you updated your hairstyle? Make-up? Personal style in general?  If it’s been a while, it may be time for a change. Especially if you are searching for a new job, it’s important to stay relevant. Besides, new hair/make-up/clothing can make anyone feel good. And when you feel good, you look good and present yourself well.
  5. Get a New Headshot. In general, a new head shot should be taken once every couple of years. If your company doesn’t do it, then it’s up to you.  Either hire a professional or ask a friend with a steady hand to snap a photo.
    • Background should be solid; a close-up shot from the shoulders up.
    • Wear professional clothing.
    • No one else in the photo, please.
    • Good lighting without shadows.
    • It’s that easy!
  6. Print New Business Cards. Make sure you have plenty, and always carry them with you! You never know when you’re going to need one.
  7. Get Your Story Straight. You find yourself on the elevator traveling 40 floors with the new CEO. She asks your name and what you do for the company. You’ve got less than 90 seconds to tell her about yourself, in a nutshell. What do you say?  It’s that kind of succinct story telling you need to develop in order to sell yourself to others, either within your company, at networking events or to potential hiring managers.  Write your long story, then edit and edit and edit until you have it down to 2 sentences. And practice saying it with confidence.
  8. Increase Your Visibility at Work. A fancy way to say, Toot Your Own Horn. Make sure people outside your department know your value. Don’t rely on your boss, or hope that your good work will stand on its own. Do some internal networking to get promoted to the position you deserve.
  9. Meet New People. This requires getting involved, and the first step is making time for it. Add the meetings to your calendar, make the commitment and GO!  Pick one or two to start with; more than that is unrealistic.  The easiest to join from a social standpoint is usually the college alumni groups, as you have a common interest.  Be sure to carry plenty of business cards!
  10. Reconnect. Make it a point to reconnect to 5 people a week. Send a quick email stating, “Hey! Long time; was remembering our days at X company. Hope you are doing well. Would love to hear from you. Let’s get together this year. I work downtown; how about you?” You may not hear from everyone, but you will hear from some.  Be sure to follow up on the coffee/happy hour meetings.

Ten tactics to get you started towards a new job, or maybe a promotion. Many you can start on –and accomplish – in one week.

What are you waiting for?

4 Tips to Keep Your Summer Job Search from Becoming a Hot Mess

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ice-cream-cone-1274894__180Who’s currently in the middle of a job search? Right now, in the middle of summer? Anyone?

If you happen to be searching for a new job this time of year, I’m sure you have a few words to say about it. And they are probably not nice.

I have been in your shoes.  At the time I had been laid-off and it seemed like “everyone in the world” was taking a vacation while I was stuck at home looking for my next opportunity.  Words that come to mind as I remember that time are: Hard. Lonely. Time. Vacation. Silence. Depressing.

And a hundred other words that all have similar meaning.

Here’s the deal: A job search is difficult no matter what time of year.  It’s lonely because it’s a solitary task; you and you alone are in charge of developing a job search plan and then acting on it.

Job seekers and hiring managers live in parallel dimensions where time moves differently.  For job-seekers, it moves slower than a glacier. For the hiring managers,’ time moves quickly as they are busy with work. It might be weeks between the company receiving our resume and actually making initial contact with us; then more time to schedule an interview; more time again for follow ups; and so on.

Job seekers have a sense of urgency when it comes to finding a new job that contradicts a perceived “lax” attitude by the hiring managers, which adds to our stress.

Throw summer in to the mix, our minds start playing games with us, and suddenly we believe there’s no hope of finding a job until fall, if ever.  We become a hot mess.

But it doesn’t have to be this way.

Here are 4 Tips to Keep Your Summer Job Search from Becoming a Hot Mess

Plan the work and work the plan.  In college we used to take butter pats in the cafeteria and fling them towards the ceiling to see if they would stick.  No strategy, just for fun.  You may think a similar approach is okay when looking for a new job; just take things one day at a time. Trust me when I say it’s not.  A job search is not easy. But what makes it difficult for many is the lack of a plan.  Develop a search plan with tactics to execute on a weekly basis to keep you on schedule. Don’t rely on the “butter pat” method.

Take advantage of summer hours. While your schedule hasn’t changed, many of your former colleagues and others in your network may have relaxed summer hours. Now is a great time to reconnect and network while they may be available for morning coffee, a lunch break or even meeting after work.  Don’t miss this opportunity to share your career goals with these valuable connections.

Go back to school. While things may be a bit slower, take time to learn something new or brush up on old skills. Sign up for an online course, read a book or enroll at a community college; attend a workshop or seminar. While you’re at it, update your resume and LinkedIn profile too.

Socialize. Face it; you’re going to get lonely while looking for a new job.  Be sure to get out and have some fun. Hit the gym, spend time on a hobby, or even volunteer. You’ll meet new friends and feel good about yourself or helping others at the same time.

Most importantly, don’t take a vacation from your job search! Hiring may slow down but it doesn’t stop. You want your name to be top-of-mind with hiring managers when they are ready to make their move.

All it takes is a little planning and a lot of patience.

Career Panic: How Do I Know If This Job Is The Right Job?

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keyboard-114439_1920My first career-panic moment occurred at the beginning of ninth grade.

I was only thirteen at the time when the guidance counselor asked, “What do you plan to major in when you get to college?”

The blank stare on my face must not have registered my answer for her as she persisted by asking, “Well, what do you want to be when you grow up?”

Honestly, I didn’t have a clue. Not one.

At that point my career plans consisted of trying out for cheerleader for the current year, with a backup plan to continue with dance and orchestra.  Looking ahead to high school I was leaning more towards drill team vs. cheerleading but I figured I had another nine months before tryouts to think about it.

The panic that took over as I thought about a life-long career option was almost too much to bear.  I went home in tears, convinced that I would be a failure in life because I had not chosen a career path at age thirteen.

My parents just smiled and said, “Don’t worry; you’ll figure it out. One step at a time.”

Easy for them to say! My life was falling apart before my eyes and they’re telling me to remain calm?

Looking back, I know that mom and dad were right.  I only wish they would have explained things a bit more.

I see a similar type of panic with some of my younger clients when they are interviewing for a job or an internship. Despite having years of college and/or degrees on their resume, many have yet to truly determine what they want to be when they “grow up”.

They ask me, “How do I know if this job is the right job? Or even the right company?”  “What if it isn’t ‘The One’”?

The answer is: You don’t know.  None of us has a crystal ball.

You don’t know if it’s the right job, the right company, if you’ll enjoy the work, or if you’ll like the people.

The only thing we can do is take it one step at a time.

Personally, I look at several criteria when evaluating a job offer:

  • How does this job fit into my overall career strategy, both long-term and short-term?
  • Will the job add something new to my resume? Skills, title, responsibility, industry?
  • Is this job satisfying a personal need and/or desire? Example, transitioning from one career to another. Could be considered part of your career strategy.
  • What’s my gut telling me?  Do I have a good feeling about the work I’ll be doing, the people, the company?
  • Conversely, have any warnings gone off in my head that won’t go away?  Sometimes that means ignoring a monetary offer so good it’s hard to pass up.

It can help to write down the answers to such questions or even perform a SWOT analysis if that makes you feel better.

But don’t over-analyze; there is no perfect answer.

Accept the job offer that feels right based on your criteria and give it your all.  Learn what you like – and don’t like – about the work and the industry.  Apply those learnings when you decide to move on to the next opportunity in a few years.

Sometimes we’ll hit a home-run the first time at bat.  But don’t panic if you strike out. More than likely, it will take a few swings before we find our true calling. 

We learn from every job experience, even those we are not crazy about.

Remember: One step at a time. One job at a time.

Most Common Interviewing Mistake

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photo-1455139960217-3de50ca3bc8cPing! Buzz! Ring! It’s so exciting when the phone alerts us with a prospective employer wanting to chat about a new opportunity.

An interview – even a phone interview – brings us one step closer to finding our next job.

When this happens, clients will immediately contact me for advice. They know the importance of the first interview; a stellar performance may secure a second interview.

The most common interviewing mistake I’ve noticed across all clients? There’s too much focus on “me” and not enough on the company.

Sometimes it’s subtle, sometimes it’s wide out in the open. Either way, the focus is misdirected.

I see this when we are doing mock interviews or when I’m reviewing written answers to potential questions that might be asked. And I stop to redirect my clients’ response.

Yet they look at me like I’ve sprouted a second head.

“But I’m trying to show them what I’m about”
“I need to figure out if the company is right for me”
“I want to explain why I’m leaving my last company”

The list goes on and on.

My open and honest feedback? Honestly, the hiring manager doesn’t care. Truly, he or she doesn’t.

Here’s what the hiring manager is thinking: “I’ve got a problem and I’m wondering if you are the person who can help me solve the problem. Are you that person?”

The hiring manager doesn’t need to know that you want a place to “learn and grow” – they probably don’t have time to teach you. They need someone to solve a problem.

If you spend too much time talking about why you are leaving your current job or why it was not a good fit, you are wasting precious time that could be spent convincing the hiring manager why you have the right skills for the job.

Think about how you answer their questions: Are you telling them more about what “you want” from the job or more about how “you can contribute” to the success of the team/organization? Big difference.

This is a hard concept for many to grasp. They think the focus of the interview process is entirely on the candidate.

It’s a two-way street, really. The company is looking for the best hire and you are looking for a good fit as well.

If it were a dance, it would be a Tango, with both parties moving back and forth in sort of give and take until a decision is made.

In this dance, remember to focus on the company and your strengths. Position your responses to show you are the answer to their problems and watch as a smile appears on the hiring manager’s face.

By doing this you are dancing your way to an offer.

3 Ways to Answer the Question, “Tell Me About Yourself “

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restaurant-690975_1280“Tell me about yourself”

It’s the one question every job candidate can expect during a job interview. You’d think candidates would slam-dunk the answer.

Based on my own experience as a hiring manager and as a job seeker, I think candidates fail miserably.

Instead of grabbing the attention of the hiring manager with our unique story, we settle in comfortably and drone on with a chronological list of our employment history, education and accomplishments.

The same information we just handed to them in the form of our resume.

It’s like a blind date gone horribly wrong. We’ve got one chance to impress our dream guy/gal with a fun tale that will leave them asking for second date, and we waste time telling them details of how long it took us to pick out an outfit.

Definitely not the story a prospective date wants to hear.

Hiring managers don’t want to hear boring stories either. They can read the details from your resume. This is your chance to tell them who you are in a way that has them saying, “Wow – what a smart go-getter. And fun! I want to have this person on my team.”

I remember back in college, each time we’d meet someone new there was a standard list of questions to ask each other. It was almost a ritual and included:

  • Where are you from?
  • What’s your major?
  • Do you live in a dorm or apartment? Where?

My friends and I would get bored with this tried and true interview, which is so similar to the “Tell me About Yourself” question we now experience when interviewing for a job. We wanted so badly to ask a series of new questions. During one of our happy hours we developed these gems:

  • Are those your shoes?
  • Does your mother know you’re here?
  • Does your hair always look like that?

While fear of hurting someone’s feelings prevented us from using these questions, our intent was simply to get some interesting feedback instead of the same old information that everyone provided.

You have a chance to break away from old habits! Take yourself to happy hour, or find a quiet spot to think about your unique story. If you hit a road block, ask a trusted friend or two to help out.

To get you started, here are three ways to answer the question, “Tell me about yourself”:

  • Sell yourself with only 3 words, and tell why those 3 words are important for you
  • Share 3 pivotal career moments that will contribute to your success at this job
  • Explain why your colleagues would recommend you for this job

I think you get the idea. Find a unique angle that tells who you are and why you would be a great asset to the hiring manager.

Smile, be confident and shine as you grab the hiring manager’s attention.

Just refrain from asking if his mom knows where he is.

Resumes Are Weird; You Must Network to Find a Job

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job-interview-156130_1280
When it comes to picking a movie, who do you trust more: your friend or an online movie critic you’ve never met?

If you picked movie critic, perhaps you need new friends. Just sayin’.

In most cases, we trust the opinions of our friends over strangers.

Our friends know us and we know them.  We have grown to value their opinion. They have our best interests at heart and would tell us the truth.

We believe them when they tell us we would enjoy the film.

The same principle is true when it comes to hiring new employees.  We believe our friends and trusted colleagues know us well enough to suggest good candidates for job openings.

This is one reason networking is crucial to your job search.   You must use your network to provide personal recommendations when it comes to securing a job.  

This video by Domics Animation is a clever demonstration of why networking is so important.  He’s right: hiring managers tend to hire someone based on the recommendation of a trusted friend or colleague over hiring a stranger.

The creator is clearly not a fan of resumes, stating “Resumes are weird”, although I believe a good resume is necessary since most of the time we all have to apply for jobs via the company’s website.  May as well make it the best it can be.

And I disagree with the author that young people don’t have networks to help them find their first job.  Even kids in high school have classmates, teachers, and friends of their parents to tap into to help find a job.

Remember: Even with a recommendation you still need to bring you’re A-Game to the interview and to the job itself.  With privilege comes great responsibility; you need to prove your worth.

The important point is to build your network and use that network when searching for a job.

Take a look!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aZ4NdEtc29o

Don’t Arrange the Furniture Before the Sale is Final

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livingroom-1032733_1280Realtors will tell prospective buyers, “Don’t arrange the furniture before the sale is final”.

As a career coach, I tell my clients the same thing. Let me explain.

What it means, in real estate terms, is never fall so in love with a house that you are mentally arranging your furniture before you own the place.

If you’ve ever searched for a new house or apartment, you understand the feeling you get when you find what appears to be the perfect new home.

It’s fun to think of putting the TV on this wall, artwork over here, the couch over there. Closing your eyes, you imagine all the parties you’ll throw. It’s so exciting to think of your future in the new house!

What harm is there, really, with getting so pumped about a new house?

For one, the deal could fall through. You need to have your game face on and be prepared to walk away. If you’re too caught up in the fantasy, you may end up paying more than you should.

Negotiating a job offer is similar to buying a new house. When we find an opportunity that we think is “the one” we start to “arrange the furniture”.

We envision ourselves in the job, driving to the office, sitting at the desk, engaging in projects and being part of the team. We think so far ahead that we fantasize about paychecks and vacation time. There may even be feelings of relief that the job search is over.

It’s good to be excited about a job opportunity. Yet we need to keep our minds sharp, take a giant step back and remember that we don’t actually have the job yet. Nothing is signed.

Humbling as it is, the company may offer the job to another candidate.

If we do get an offer, things can change and it may not be exactly what we hoped for, or at all like the opportunity first presented to us. We should maintain complete objectivity while negotiating the best possible agreement. And be prepared to walk away in the rare instance that it’s really not right.

When we mentally “arrange the furniture”, becoming so engaged that we see ourselves sitting at the desk, we tend to lose our negotiating edge. We may agree to points that otherwise would give us reason to pause, such as salary or vacation, or even the job responsibilities itself, simply out of fear that we may lose the opportunity if we don’t acquiesce to their demands.

Keep your game face on until the ink is dry and you are happy with the terms of the agreement.

Then – and only then – start arranging the furniture, mentally hanging pictures in your new office.

5 Ways to Improve Your Resume In One Hour

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smart-watch-821557_1920If you’re anything like me, quite often you wish for more time. More time to finish a project, go to the movies, take a vacation, go to the gym, or spend time with family and friends.

You might say “falling back” with Daylight Savings Time is like receiving the gift of an extra hour. Despite my desire for more time, I have a love-hate relationship with this particular extra hour.

Love it because I get an extra hour once a year and the sun shines earlier in the morning so I’m not trying to pry myself out of bed in the dark. Hate it because it’s dark by five o’clock and it feels like midnight when I’m eating dinner at my usual hour.

Honestly, I will spend the next five months counting the days until we switch back and I lose an hour. I love the daylight that much. Not to mention I love warm weather. Hate the cold.

Right now, we’ve got an extra hour and we should use it to our advantage. Here are five ways to improve your resume in one hour:

  1. Add Social Media Links. Include a link to your LinkedIn page, as well as your website and other relevant social media accounts.  This is a good time to personalize your LinkedIn address too – www.linkedin.com/firstnamelastname. Reminder: make sure any links are live and connect to the correct page.
  2. Update Your Personal Statement. At the top of your resume should be your personal statement that tells the hiring manager who you are and what you can do to solve their problems.  If the top of your resume still says, “Seeking a job in X industry”, it’s time to start over.
  3. Highlight Career Wins. Show hiring managers what you bring to the table by sharing quantifiable success stories from each of your jobs. “Reduced operating expenses by eight percent in first quarter” or, “Developed and executed consumer program resulting in ten percent sales increase”. Show the hiring manager you mean business.
  4. Add New Skills or Awards. Did you take a course? Earn a certificate? Receive an award or other recognition?  Be sure to include any new skills, education or awards.  Remember, though, it must be relevant to your career.
  5. Out With the Old. There comes a time when our first job(s) need to be removed from our resumes. Same for irrelevant information such as street address (list only city and state), the words “cell phone” or “home phone” (simply list the number, preferably your cell phone), hobbies, personal information (age, height, political affiliation, etc.), anything related to high school, and the phrase, “references available upon request”.