(Today is a departure from my usual humor. Bear with me; this means a lot to me.)
Recently I was shocked to learn that a long-time friend had passed away. Opening the paper to the obituary section, his face jumped out at me and my heart fell.
We had been friends for what seems like forever. We were the kind of friends that may not speak regularly, sometimes communicating through Christmas cards alone. But we were always there for each other.
He could make me laugh with his stories. He came to my side when I was recovering from life-threatening illness. He was pivotal in helping my family when dad died. Learning of his death rattled me to my core.
The visitation at the funeral home was difficult since I had no idea he had been sick. Such a private individual, I’m sure he didn’t want anyone fussing over him. Cancer is never a good thing, is it?
I needed to be there. To express my condolences to his life-partner and extended family. I needed to be there for myself too, to understand what happened and say good-bye.
What breaks my heart the most is not learning that he suffered from cancer. It was hearing that, like many of us, he had lost his job some time ago. Always difficult for anyone. It’s my understanding that in his final months and days, as he battled illness, he felt like a failure. Simply because he lost his job.
My fear is that there are many people who feel like a failure because of a job loss. Listen to me, people: you are not a failure.
We are so much more than our jobs. While we know this deep down, it’s still a difficult concept for many of us to accept. But please take a step back and relish your success: your friends, your family, your skills, your education, your health. A job loss is insignificant in comparison.
If you know someone who’s lost their job, reach out to them. Just in case they might be feeling less-than successful.
I wish I had known that you were suffering, my friend. I’ll miss you and your caring spirit. Rest in peace.
Like Tami, I was terminated once (By my best friend, BTW – he is now on the board of the agency I lead, so I got him back – ha!), but you don’t have to be unemployed to learn something from this book. 
tami — beautifully said. we are so beyond “what we do,” it is all about “what we are.” thanks for spreading that word.
I’m so sorry for your loss and you’re absolutely right.