Hubby laughed at me last night. This isn’t entirely unusual as some of the things I do and say are funny. And Hubby has a quick wit; it doesn’t take much for him to break into laughter.
Although this time I was being serious. Aside from my “real” work, I’m also the official travel agent for our family and I was diligently planning our summer vacation. I’m usually the one that starts the initial conversation about vacation months in advance, as well as the one to push, prod, drag and otherwise coerce Hubby into getting with the program. Don’t get me wrong; Hubby enjoys taking a vacation as much as I do. It’s just that he seems unable to focus on the planning of a vacation.
In the back of his mind, Hubby knows that he wants to take a summer vacation. He even has a good idea of the dates he’d like to go on said vacation. It’s just that since the trip is not imminent, meaning tomorrow, he doesn’t focus on it. I’m pretty sure if I didn’t drive the vacation bus, Hubby would wait till the last minute and try to throw something together. (Must be a guy-thing) This would be OK if our standards were the same as they were when we were young without much money. We’d simply pack a tent to go camping or drive a couple hours to another city for a few nights in an economy-class motel. Hubby disputes this last statement, as my camping days were pre-Hubby and he hasn’t actually seen me camp. But I have camped; I have pictures to prove it.
Hubby has learned that when it comes to vacations, economy class is not how I roll. I’ve paid my dues; we make money now and I enjoy vacationing in style, a la “lifestyles of the rich and famous”. That means staying at a four or five star resort, being treated like royalty and basking in the luxury. I mean, why not? If I can’t live that way year ‘round, then at least I can live that way for a week on vacation. Good news is that Hubby has also become accustomed to this way of vacationing.
I had secured a week at our favorite resort and needed to tackle the airplane reservations. Hubby had heard my pleas earlier in the day about finalizing the trip and he even suggested we sit down together to finish the job. Sweet! I don’t mind making the reservations but I’d really like his input.
We had a couple decisions to make. Do we take an early morning flight out to maximize our first day, since we’re going west? That’s a no-brainer; of course we do. We can be lounging at the pool by noon. But what about our return flight? We want to maximize our time away yet it’s always tough to arrive late at night and assimilate back into the “real world”.
All of a sudden I panicked as I envisioned our trip. The glorious feeling of arriving, with a week laid out in front of us and nothing to do but relax. As my mind wandered I envisioned the first few days of bliss, then my thoughts raced to the last couple of days, and the depressing feeling of leaving paradise to return to the grind took hold. A tear accidentally ran down my cheek. Hubby looked at me, quite puzzled. “What’s wrong?” he asked. “I’m already sad about leaving our vacation to return home”, I replied. That’s when he started laughing.
“So you’re planning on leaving a vacation we haven’t started yet?” he said. More laughter. Lots of teasing. “Only you would think like that”. While I admit that I am unique in good ways, I certainly don’t want to be called out like this.
Actually, planning to leave helps me. If I can envision what it might be like, then it doesn’t seem to hurt as much when it actually happens. I deal with lots of things that way. I’m always planning and thinking about different scenarios – in work situations as well as life.
Planning to leave a work situation is something that everyone should do, in my opinion. Whether I leave a job on my own, or even during the lay-off when the decision was out of my hands, I always consider what it will be like and think about next steps. Being a bit on edge keeps me focused on the fact that my current job is probably not my last job, and I keep myself open to opportunities as well as constantly net-working. No matter how I leave a job, I’ve given it some thought and am at least somewhat prepared.
Hubby can laugh all he wants. He’ll be the one crying as we leave the resort. Since I’ve already thought about it, I’m prepared to handle the situation. I’ll bring a box of tissues for him.
© Tami Cannizzaro 2012 All Rights Reserved
Like Tami, I was terminated once (By my best friend, BTW – he is now on the board of the agency I lead, so I got him back – ha!), but you don’t have to be unemployed to learn something from this book. 
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